Seen in a consult note for a morbidly obese gentleman with heart failure: “…apparently while his wife was working, Mr. X had been sitting at home consuming massive quantities of calories and not exercising…”
A guy in his 20’s came in with his fiancee (she forced him to apparently) and stated that he got drunk one night and wanted to “play with himself.” He stated he shoved his testicles “back up the tubes.” Sure enough they were partially lodged in the inguinal canal. The worst part is that he waited 2 YEARS to be seen for it. Ouch!
I am wheeled into the ER by my dad because I can’t walk due to the pain in my legs from dehydration. Dehydration, by the way, was my chief complaint. All vitals were consistent with this, and when the doctor came into the room to ask what was wrong, I said I was dehydrated. He looked at me and said “you don’t look like it to me.” Then he turned around and walked out. My dad and I waited another hour for something to happen when finally a nurse came in and said “oh, you’re still here? The doctor discharged you an hour ago.”
$100 to tell me I don’t look dehydrated. No blood work, no fluids, no physical examination. Not even a cup of water.
I fainted in the parking lot on the way out.
That got their attention.
A couple brings in their 8 month old stating they saw blood in her stool. First the night before and then that morning, they even brought the diaper so that we could verify. Upon inspection we asked if the child is eating solid foods, then point out that its just tomato skins. The look on their faces was priceless as they admitted child had tomato the day before.
Hello all you ‘tards – you don’t know me, nor do I know you, just like we all like it.
I want to first off, thank you for visiting this site. I started this site a few years back with the intention of bringing laughter to all who visit by showcasing the inept, crazy, and just downright retarded people who visit the ER.
Secondly, I apologize I haven’t been keeping up with the site in almost a year. Life happens and I got bored with the site. Would I like to keep this site going and posting all the funny stories that come in? Hell yes I would, but there are just not enough hours in the day to make that happen. I encourage you to still send in all those stories on the Submit a Story page and I’ll try to get around to posting it. I have about a dozen in the queue I would like to get up soon if I can find the time.
In the meantime, I also encourage you to visit the website of a side project/business I recently started – iPix Photo Booths. I moved to a new city (San Diego) and had been looking for a fun side project that would get me away from my normal job. The whole goal of this new project is to offer a photo booth rental in San Diego and the surrounding cities. So, if you live in the San Diego area and are looking to rent a photo booth for a party, event, or shit, even a bar mitzvah, I’m your guy! When you fill out the form on the contact page, just mention you are saw this note and I’ll be happy to cut you a great price.
Anyway, that’s enough for now. Thanks for listening to my rambling and get back to work!