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Category: Drunks

Patient is admitted after drinking antifreeze. Went through dialysis and nearly died, is now better and transferred to our hospital so she can get help to stop drinking. Perhaps it would work better if she wasn't drinking from the hand sanitizing gel dispensers around the wards and down in the reception area.

#1476 (0) - Jun 20, 2010 10:54 AM by Mette - Drunks - Get back to the waiting room (72) - I dunno, seems legit. (31)

3am: my partner and I were dispatched to a 30yo m c/o dyspnea. We respond to find pt outside waving us down. He told me that he had turkey stuck in his throat and needed to be seen in the ER to fox the problem. Pt strong odor of ETOH, ataxic, and had this ridiculously goofy (and kind of creepy) grin on his face. Took him to the ER. 4am: dispatched to the end of a bridge for teen seizing. We get there and find the same guy called 911 for a ride back home... Left him there, PD aware of situation.

#1445 (0) - Jun 5, 2010 10:46 AM by Anonymous - Drunks - Get back to the waiting room (65) - I dunno, seems legit. (10)

A few years ago, I noticed a truck that had flipped over on the highway as I was heading to work. I knew that fate would intervene that night. They brought this guy up to the floor a few hours later, three sheets to the wind and naked except for a pair of satin boxer shorts. The shorts were printed with lovely red hearts. He made a pass at me as I was handing him his urinal. His wife asked me later if he had come in wearing his wedding ring. Guess the answer to that question.

#1400 (0) - Mar 30, 2010 10:32 PM by Anonymous - Drunks - Get back to the waiting room (61) - I dunno, seems legit. (21)

We had a frequent flyer drunk who was brought in by her husband when he just couldn't take her shenanigans anymore. This time she said she took a handful of Tylenol. As the tests were being run, I proceed to hand her a cup of charcoal (used to treat OD) to drink, when she turns to me making a face and says "shit, can't you at least put some sugar in it, this is the worst cup of coffee I have ever had" I had to hold back the laughs even though the whole nurse's station was in cracking up.

#1323 (0) - Mar 4, 2010 12:01 PM by Jack Attack - Drunks - Get back to the waiting room (81) - I dunno, seems legit. (6)

In ED, helping take off a drunk's boots. He was obviosuly homeless and reeked. As I slipped his boot off, three of his toes came off with it.

#1194 (0) - Feb 2, 2010 11:47 PM by gangrene - Drunks - Get back to the waiting room (13) - I dunno, seems legit. (182)

Pt: "this is bullshit, i want to go back to the methadone clinic now!" RN: "You're only here because you insisted on drinking their hand sanitizer." (hand sanitizer is alcohol based)

#1109 (0) - Jan 1, 2010 01:12 PM by Anonymous - Drunks - Get back to the waiting room (131) - I dunno, seems legit. (4)

Got called to "man with broken ankle, sitting on curb." Upon approach to pt. I could smell very strong ETOH. I asked the man what was going on. His drunken reply, "I broke my ankle." "Really, I asked, How do you know?" The man, who had his R leg crossed over his left, reached down, picked up his R foot & dropped it. The foot bounced around like a bobblehead doll--A complete shearing fx. My partner came up & I asked the man to do it again...and he did! We all laughed. We treated & transported.

#1092 (0) - Dec 26, 2009 09:38 AM by Former Paramedic - Drunks - Get back to the waiting room (68) - I dunno, seems legit. (52)

21 y/o male rolls his truck while driving home drunk. Gets out of the truck with no real injuries except some abrasions, decides he needs a tow truck. Breaks into nearby business and calls 911 and asks for the number for a tow truck. He ended up being charged with drinking and driving and break and enter.

#1066 (0) - Dec 12, 2009 03:26 PM by Anonymous - Drunks - Get back to the waiting room (88) - I dunno, seems legit. (5)

Police brought in a drunk who crashed his car after avoiding a cat on the road. Usually police don't laugh in such matters. The difference this time being that he didn't hurt anyone and the fact that the cat he tried to avoid was actually a pine cone.

#992 (0) - Nov 24, 2009 12:06 PM by Anonymous - Drunks - Get back to the waiting room (93) - I dunno, seems legit. (6)

Patient: "pew pew pew pew". Male PT high on meth and grabbing/pointing his penis like a laser gun.

#943 (0) - Nov 24, 2009 08:55 AM by Anonymous - Drunks - Get back to the waiting room (82) - I dunno, seems legit. (12)


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