Earring Back
23 y/o female presents to the ER at 2 am because she was unable to unscrew the back off of her earring and her ear was beginning to hurt.
Lose His Shit
Patient states that he “doesn’t know if I slept funny but my neck hurts.” He then proceeded to lose his shit and yell at the triage nurse when a 6-year-old with a broken arm was seen before him.
Unresponsive on Couch
EMS dispatched to home for “unresponsive” patient. Roommate states patient had not slept in three days but was unresponsive on couch. EMS found male patient lounging in recliner, snoring. They woke patient from sleep, obtained refusal signature, and refrained from telling roommate she’s a moron.
Give Us a Call
Pt: “The wait is too long, we’re going to go out for dinner and will come back. Can you give us a call?”
Itchy Eyes
Pt: “I’ve had itchy eyes for 11 years.”
RN: “And what makes this an emergency today?”
Pt: “….”