CC: "Choked on a b
CC: “Choked on a biscuit” (obviously there was not enough mustard on it)
PA tells me "go che
PA tells me “go check the lac in room 10″. 50 y/o f sitting on stetcher, nad, watching tv, big bandaid on top of rfa. I introduce myself, glove up and peel bandaid off to reveal….. Pinpoint mark, neg current bleeding, neg sign of previous bleed. Ask about injury. Pt says “my arm touched the end of the knife so i thought i should get it checked”. Cleaned w/ns, bacitracin & new bandaid.
on one of our 24 hou
on one of our 24 hours shifts, our first call of the day was a woman from a local living facility for MR people for a “spoon stuck in her mouth with severe hemorhaging.” We get there and the girl had one of those rubber-covered end spoons suctioned under her tongue in her lower pallate and had broken her tooth when she bit down on the metal handle… staff couldnt get it out…took doc about 3 minutes to pry it out– and she never bled.
A young lady came in
A young lady came in after a minor accident in shopping mall parking lot. She c/o severe toe pain “to all her toes” ” both feet”. So the EMT splinted both feet with IV arm boards(long ones). I asked, as she rolled by the desk on a stretcher “down high or cross country” accident. Every one at desk laughed… Of course her toes were fine!! X-ray machines can cure a lot , every notice how someone can get up and walk after you tell them there is no fracture!
A couple comes into
A couple comes into peds ER with their 4 mo baby. The formula milk looks funny. They did´t feed the baby the formula, but they “just wanted to leave the record” of the incident.
911 dispatch to a sy
911 dispatch to a syncope call, when my female partner and I get to the door she is the only one allowed in. After about 5 minutes she exits the apartment laughing with the AMA signed. It turns out the couple were enjoying a little oral sex when he got light headed and passed out. I suggested we go back and tell him to marry her.
Called to the local
Called to the local inpatient addiction / rehab “hospital” to transport someone who can’t seem to stay awake, problem is the call came in at 0300 hrs.
Patient comes into t
Patient comes into the ER with this chief complaint: ” I saw flying saucer land in the desert and I have been abducted. I think they put in an alien probe inside my body and I want it taken out! Do you think my insurance will cover it?” The ER doctor answers; ” I don’t know about the insurance but I can tell you this. You need to go to (mentions name of a nearby hospital) because they have a special machine there that will take out that probe. We don’t have that kind of machine here!”