ER story archive
The unforgettable things medical professionals say and do.
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So a new resident began his rotation in the ER last week. I work as a CT tech and was called into to do a scan at 2am. The only complaint the patient had was that they heard voices coming from their chest. So the doctor ordered a CT scan. sounds like more of a psych thing to me but ...
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So today we get a call from a family doctor that has a patient with a toe ulcer that he’s had for 3 months. The doctor wants to send this patient into the ER by ambulance despite this not being an emergency. The patient’s son meets his father at the doctor’s office and follows the ambulance to the hospital. Nice ...
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So we have a doctor from eastern europe working in the ER. A patient calls up explaining that he can’t quit taking heroin cold turkey and needs help. Confused and not familiar with the phrase, told the patient to heat up his turkey and thought the patient was pulling his leg. haha.
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“so you’ve had this problem for 6 years, have you seen your family doctor about it?”
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The best work excuse given out by one of our fiesty ER docs was "Flatulence"!
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They don’t show the real ER on TV…they cant…it would be politically incorrect…I wonder why,in many cases,are those patients that are getting their treatment for free..( you and me) are the most unappreciative….just seems that way
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To a 79 year old man “How did you get that scrotal bruising?” He had a scrotal hematoma the size of a small melon. His response was “I was waxing my balls”. Fair enough but wow I did not really need to know that.
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Today, I take my boyfriend to the ER since we thought he might have broken his ankle and ask some nurse for some ice. She responds with “why?”. gee, i wonder why.. maybe I want to make myself a drink.
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A doctor once gave a student a urine specimen to test. The student dipped it showed it had a very large glucose level. The doctor smiled, took the specimen, and drank the contents.
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EMS write-up of pt history: “Pt had a vowel replaced in his heart.” Now which vowel was it, “A” or “E”?
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We do bedside registration, so sometimes things happen between the time a patient arrives in the room and the time registration arrives. In this case, the woman came in alive and coded/pronounced within about 30 minutes. Our registrar walks in, takes the ID and insurance info from the family, and then comes back. She says “Can one of you sign? ...
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While gently cleansing an elderly woman of feces with another nurse..little old lady said “your treating me like a dog” to which my fellow nurse stated “no we aren’t… now roll over!”
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Male patient presents with a complaint of injury after cutting his hand with a meat slicer. After seeing the physician, patient asks, “Doc, will I be able to play the piano?” “Only
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A friend of mine was on her first day of ER orientation as a tech. She failed to eat breakfast or drink anything during her shift.
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