ERTards.com gives users a venue to vent their frustrations when dealing with patients or staff in emergency rooms around the world. There are a great deal of stupid people out there that have no idea what the word ’emergency’ means. Their antics are often times amusing as are the assumptions by some staff members. The site is meant to be fun to read and can be enjoyed on a daily basis. Life in the ER is very different from the melodrama shown on TV (we’re talking about ER, it’s pretty close to Scrubs, though).

Who’s behind ERTards.com?
A couple of ER staffers who felt it was high time people outside the industry got a first hand view at the antics that grace all emergency rooms.

What’s this site all about?
ERTards.com contains a daily dose of life in emergency rooms and the antics by those swimming in the shallow end of the gene pool.

What do these abbreviation mean?
Here is a list of common abbreviations and acronyms found on the site:
02 = Oxygen
ASA = Aspirin
B/C = Because
BM, B/M = Bowel Movement
BP, B/P = Blood Pressure
Ca = Cancer/carcinoma
C/O = Complains Of
C/C = Chief Complaint
COPD = Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease
Dx = Diagnosis
ED = Emergency Department
Fx = Fracture
GSW = Gunshot Wound
HBD = Has Been Drinking
Hx = History
LAC = Laceration
MI = Myocardial Infarction (heart attack)
PO = By Mouth
PRN = As Needed
Pt = Patient
Rx, Tx = Treatment
SOB = Shortness of Breath
x = Times
YO, Y/O = Years Old

How does it work?
Quite simply: each user can contribute to the site and submit his own story by clicking on the ‘Submit’ link in the menu at the top of the page. To be published, your story will have to be approved by our team. As soon as your story is online, visitors can vote for it in two different ways: ‘I agree, what a tard’ when they agree or ‘You loose, get out’. These votes allow us to rank your stories in 2 categories: ‘Top Visits’ and ‘Worst Visits’. Both categories can be found in the menu at the top of the page.

I’ve just sent in my ‘tard, what happens now?
The ‘tard you’ve sent will be put through the moderation system, where our moderators will vote on whether they want to story to be published on the site.

Why has my ‘tard not been approved?
If it is poorly written or contains hate (racism or other bullshit) it likely will not make the site. Don’t worry about posting ‘gross’ stories as we like that sort of thing.

Does the site contain fake stories?
Any this is possible since we can’t verify the stories but from personal experience, I’m willing to believe even the most insane story. Working in the ER gives you insight to what people truly are like and it’s scary. If you don’t believe the stories, you’re likely one of the people who asks how long the wait is.

How do I keep in touch with ERTards.com wherever I may be?
The site functions on iPhones, Android, and other mobile devices. You can also find us on Twitter and Facebook.

Why do you have ads on your site?
Ads help cover the costs associated with running and hosting the site. We apologize for blasting your entertainment with an ad for random items, it’s a sacrifice we have to make.

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Most Votes

Seems legit

  1. Hey, there is something in my scrotum! (520)
  2. Are You Diabetic? (319)
  3. Hygiene First! (303)
  4. I'm pregnant, I think! (268)
  5. A dang hangnail? (209)
  6. Can you check these bumps? (176)
  7. A Shocking Ending (169)
  8. My wife, uh, has worms (164)
  9. Help me, I'm homeless (159)
  10. Patient is in "stable" condition (152)
  11. Peeping Psych (149)
  12. Let the Lord Heal Your Baby (147)
  13. Yummy! (142)
  14. I pooped and I can't get up! (133)
  15. It's a Mall Emergency! (130)
  16. Broken Rubber (121)
  17. Allergic to Tylenol (121)
  18. Morphine Doesn't Help (110)
  19. Yup, You're Preggers (109)
  20. Airplane vs. Nose (109)

Kind of fishy

  1. Patient's Boot (43)
  2. I'm pregnant, I think! (42)
  3. Sorry, I had to mow the lawn (39)
  4. Hey, there is something in my scrotum! (38)
  5. Patient is in "stable" condition (33)
  6. Cash or Credit? (31)
  7. Kentucky Jelly (30)
  8. My wife, uh, has worms (25)
  9. Broken Rubber (23)
  10. Job Well Done (22)
  11. Airplane vs. Nose (21)
  12. Are You Diabetic? (20)
  13. Peeping Psych (18)
  14. Fresh Breath (18)
  15. Chief complaint: Pine Sol (17)
  16. Super Duper! (17)
  17. Bedpost Toy (17)
  18. Help me, I'm homeless (16)
  19. Let the Lord Heal Your Baby (16)
  20. I need to get into my house! (16)


  1. Kentucky Jelly (608)
  2. Sorry, I had to mow the lawn (565)
  3. Patient is in "stable" condition (250)
  4. When's Your Birthday? (108)
  5. Contraceptive Jelly (94)
  6. They Done Named Her (91)
  7. Spoon in the Ass (75)
  8. Job Well Done (72)
  9. Prostate Exam at 3AM (70)
  10. It Hurts When I Do This (64)
  11. Smells Like Burnt Asshole (64)
  12. My wife, uh, has worms (62)
  13. A New Boy Toy (56)
  14. I overheard a pt in (52)
  15. Magnets in the Floor (50)
  16. Alien Probe (50)
  17. Call it Schizophrenia (49)
  18. Let the Lord Heal Your Baby (48)
  19. A pikie bloke comes (48)
  20. Bang for his Buck (47)