Sep 15, 2012
ERtards

I need to get into my house!

A large, 41-year-old man was brought in by ambulance to the emergency room and was dazed and confused.

The story goes: he was heavily intoxicated at home and had lashed out or flailed his arm and somehow penetrated his forearm on a long blunt door handle. This was only the beginning because the door handle was still lodged in his upper limb (the ambos removed the handle from the door and not risk taking it out).

Eventually the handle was removed, the wound cleaned and sutured, and he was discharged.

But before leaving he slurred, “Give that back, I need to get into me house!”

 

What do you think of this Story?
  • Seems legit (97)
  • Kind of fishy (16)
  • Fake (21)

1 Comment

  • Fake. ER would never discharge people that are still drunk.

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Most Votes

Seems legit

  1. Hey, there is something in my scrotum! (518)
  2. Are You Diabetic? (317)
  3. Hygiene First! (302)
  4. I'm pregnant, I think! (268)
  5. A dang hangnail? (209)
  6. Can you check these bumps? (175)
  7. A Shocking Ending (169)
  8. My wife, uh, has worms (163)
  9. Help me, I'm homeless (158)
  10. Patient is in "stable" condition (151)
  11. Peeping Psych (148)
  12. Let the Lord Heal Your Baby (145)
  13. Yummy! (141)
  14. I pooped and I can't get up! (132)
  15. It's a Mall Emergency! (130)
  16. Allergic to Tylenol (120)
  17. Broken Rubber (119)
  18. Morphine Doesn't Help (109)
  19. Yup, You're Preggers (108)
  20. Airplane vs. Nose (108)

Kind of fishy

  1. Patient's Boot (43)
  2. I'm pregnant, I think! (42)
  3. Sorry, I had to mow the lawn (39)
  4. Hey, there is something in my scrotum! (38)
  5. Patient is in "stable" condition (33)
  6. Cash or Credit? (31)
  7. Kentucky Jelly (30)
  8. My wife, uh, has worms (25)
  9. Broken Rubber (23)
  10. Job Well Done (22)
  11. Airplane vs. Nose (21)
  12. Are You Diabetic? (20)
  13. Peeping Psych (18)
  14. Fresh Breath (18)
  15. Chief complaint: Pine Sol (17)
  16. Super Duper! (17)
  17. Bedpost Toy (17)
  18. Help me, I'm homeless (16)
  19. Let the Lord Heal Your Baby (16)
  20. I need to get into my house! (16)

Fake

  1. Kentucky Jelly (605)
  2. Sorry, I had to mow the lawn (560)
  3. Patient is in "stable" condition (250)
  4. When's Your Birthday? (105)
  5. Contraceptive Jelly (93)
  6. They Done Named Her (90)
  7. Spoon in the Ass (75)
  8. Job Well Done (71)
  9. Prostate Exam at 3AM (70)
  10. It Hurts When I Do This (64)
  11. Smells Like Burnt Asshole (64)
  12. My wife, uh, has worms (60)
  13. A New Boy Toy (55)
  14. I overheard a pt in (52)
  15. Magnets in the Floor (50)
  16. Alien Probe (50)
  17. Call it Schizophrenia (48)
  18. Let the Lord Heal Your Baby (48)
  19. Bang for his Buck (47)
  20. A pikie bloke comes (45)