A frequent visitor comes into the ER with her latest attempt for pain medications, complaining that she is dying of pain.
I asked, “Where is it that you are hurting?”
She told me that she hurt all over, so I asked, “When did you start hurting?”
She said, “Well it all started when I decided to change the batteries in the remote. I put the old ones in my mouth while placing the new and without thinking, I just swallowed them! You think I can get some Dilaudid for the pain?”
After multiple X-rays to be sure none of the batteries had broken open, she was given milk of magnesia to speed the process up of expelling the batteries.