Back Up the Tubes

A guy in his 20’s came in with his fiancee (she forced him to apparently) and stated that he got drunk one night and wanted to “play with himself.” He stated he shoved his testicles “back up the tubes.” Sure enough they were partially lodged in the inguinal canal. The worst part is that he waited 2 YEARS to be seen for it. Ouch!

Broken Rubber

Dispatched out at 0115 for “injured person.” Arrived to find a 16 y/o female who, in a low voice, said, “My boyfriend’s rubber just broke and I need a pregnancy test.”

Dispatched out at 0115 for “injured person.” Arrived to find a 16 y/o female who, in a low voice, said, “My boyfriend’s rubber just broke and I need a pregnancy test.”

First Dose of Pills

Patient comes in to ER complaining of STD symptoms for a month. He was seen and treated the previous month for same symptoms. Pt responds, “I only took the first dose of pills that I was given, I didn’t know I had to take the rest.”

Patient comes in to ER complaining of STD symptoms for a month. He was seen and treated the previous month for same symptoms. Pt responds, “I only took the first dose of pills that I was given, I didn’t know I had to take the rest.”

New Year, New STD

A few days after New Year’s, a male comes in with a chief complaint that he doesn’t feel well and wants an STD check. He mutters, “Ugh…New Year’s Eve was really crazy.”

A few days after New Year’s, a male comes in with a chief complaint that he doesn’t feel well and wants an STD check. He mutters, “Ugh…New Year’s Eve was really crazy.”